I had just gotten home from a successful interview when I began receiving a string of text messages from Baby-Paca telling me that she had just finished school but had to be back at 7 for a meeting and how she was hungry enough to eat a whole cow. Initially, I was just going to stay home, but Baby-Paca wanted company, so being the wonderful sister that I am, I decided I’d rendezvous with her wherever she decided she wanted to eat. Like a majority of siblings, we have a very love-hate relationship. While we bicker and pull each others’ hairs out all the time, I know she’d be hella lonely and miss me every day that I’m gone (such as when I’m away on vacation). Plus she wouldn’t have anyone to get excited over food or share with or complain to and watch dramas with.
I had gotten off the bus and stalked Baby-Paca for a good 2 blocks before she noticed me. After I had my fun, I revealed my location and we walked over to Cockney Kings. Cockney Kings took us on a trip to memory lane. Baby-Paca and I started talking about how delighted we got when dad used to buy us fish and chips when we were kids and our parents were still together and how we haven’t been back much since. Then it occurred to me that the last time I ate at Cockney Kings was with Stud Muffin about a year ago, which catalyzed a whole ‘nother series of recollections. It always put a smile on my face seeing how excited he would get for all you can eat. Unfortunately, he’s not around to pig out with me anymore.
Anyway, that’s enough side tracking! There was a wait list when we arrived. There were a few empty tables but the waitresses had not gotten around to cleaning them. We were seated after about 10-15 minutes. Baby-Paca mentioned how Cockney Kings would be a super chill place to work, since everyone moved at their own pace.
On Mondays-Wednesdays, Cockney Kings offers all you can eat fish and chips for $10.95. Initially, I was just going to order off the menu, since I’ve been trying to reduce calorific intake (without much success, because let’s face it, food is too good, and I get really hungry whenever I have classes. All that brain power, right?!). But after looking at the prices, I changed my mind seeing as all you can eat was obviously a much better deal. The paper setting has Cockney slangs printed on them, and it has colouring, connect the dots, etc. on the back to keep kids entertained. I always have a good laugh going through the placemats while waiting for food to arrive.
The all you can eat comes with bottomless soda pop. Baby-Paca had 2 refills of her ginger ale before I even finished one glass. The fish in the all you can eat fish and chips is the pollock variety. We had a whole bottle of Cockney Kings’ delicious tartar sauce at our disposal. The pollock was piping hot, flaky, moist and tender. The British style batter was fried to crispy golden perfection without being overly greasy. However, I would’ve liked if the fish itself was seasoned as it lacked sodium if eaten without tartar sauce. As for the chips, they were fresh and full of potato-y goodness, crunchy on the outside and fluffy on the inside.
Baby-Paca and I had a satisfying meal. I had ruined my diet plans for the day, but it was worth it. Since we’ve moved back to the North Burnaby area, I think we’ll come by more often now that we actually remember this place. Baby-Paca said she’s heard that the poutine here was good, but they had run out of cheese curds. I guess we’ll have to save it for next time!
COCKNEY KINGS FISH AND CHIPS
+1 604 291 1323
Kensington Square, 6574 Hastings Street, Burnaby